In Limbo

In May, I mentioned to a rugby friend while we were reffing at a tournament that I would love to have a part-time job over the summer. My savings were pretty much exhausted and I also thought it would help structure my bar-studying if I had something else on my schedule.

From the first day at City Sports, I expected to be there 3 months, max. I was making a little over minimum wage, working with kids a decade younger than me, and let's be honest, folding t-shirts. It was a great mindless job while I was studying for the bar.

August has become September...October...November...December. Some of my classmates have found jobs - less than half. NUSL previously offered a Bridge Fellowship where they fund you to work a non-profit half-time for three months. Without explanation, the Bridge Fellowship is not being offered this year.

I deal with all sorts of issues that the low-income clients I usually serve have to deal with:

• my feet hurt after eight hour shifts standing and walking
• not sure about my schedule, not sure I can take days off
• not sure about getting forty hours each week
• trying to get health insurance
• no paid sick days
• can't return phone calls while at work
• exhausted when I get home
• making $9-9.50/hour
• no paid vacation/holidays

Part of me is hoping this will make me a better lawyer someday. Most of me is just exhausted. I'm also embarrassed to not have a job, sad that I am being rejected from positions where I think I would be an asset, and stressed about the minimal number of jobs I can find. I was awash in all of these emotions before going into my big family Thanksgiving (approx 65 people). One relative even had the audacity to ask "Don't you have any prospects?"

I am in limbo, and it hurts.

Reading list for 2013 (Jan-July)

• Les Miserables by Victor Hugo - I love the musical and the movie, so I wanted to read the real thing. While it took a while, a few pages at a time, I loved having the Kindle and toting Les Miz with me all over India. I read it in Lodi Gardens and outside the Taj Mahal. I read it on long solo train rides and curled up in my sleep sack with homemade hot water bottles during the two weeks that it was cold. I think it's going to be one of those things where I like the book better for already knowing the plot from the movie, and now I'll enjoy the movie more because I know more details from the book.
• The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway - exactly what you expect from Hemingway, and a style I really enjoy reading. Besides the overall depressing effect that Hemingway brings.
• Emma by Jane Austen - one of my best friends is a huge Austen fan, and over the years I've gotten sucked into watching Pride & Prejudice enough times that I can no longer blame it on anyone else. This was a lighthearted read about matchmaking in post-Victorian England.
• The Time Machine by H.G. Wells and
• The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells - I was more entertained by War of the Worlds, but wasn't particularly into either of these books. They've popped up a few times on classic lists, and they were free on the Kindle, so I read them. Perhaps sci-fi and suspending reality for alien invasions isn't my thing.
• Let Me Tell You A Story by Red Auerbach and John Feinstein - this was a great reading experience. I wasn't feeling well, and had schoolwork to do, but one day this spring I curled up and spent half the day reading. I don't do that often and it reminded me of being a kid and I loved it. The book is an autobiography about the late great Celtics (and GW) player/coach/manager, and a history of the development of professional basketball, particularly in DC and Boston.
• The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald - I went to see Gatsby with friends, and realized I had no impression of the book after speed-reading it a few years ago. So I re-read it after and found it enjoyable, but not mind-blowing.
• Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez - I borrowed this from my roommate in DC, which means it's been on my bookshelf for approximately 3-3.5 years. I started it twice and couldn't get into it, and then tackled it as a bar exam break in June. I enjoyed it but wouldn't describe it as a "must-read."
• Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. - has been at the top of my reading list for a few years, and I finally got to it. Despite the warning that it ends "poo tee weet" it still caught me off guard and wanting more. I will definitely be looking for more Vonnegut books to read.
• The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde - a very popular play that was a quick read on the Kindle. I can't think of any plays besides Shakespeare that I really enjoy reading.  Similar to A Raisin in the Sun, it just felt too...short? I want more details and descriptions.

 Read in 2012 and never posted:

• The Hunger Games: Catching Fire and Mockingjay - I caved and bought these over Christmas 2011, and then promptly resold them on Craigslist. Fun, fast reads, but the character development is pretty much abandoned by the third book and it's just an action-packed page turner.
• The Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison - a great provocative read that had been on a number of recommended reading lists. Unfortunately I borrowed it from Boston Public Library as a 1L and it's still on my shelf, which means I probably owe a hefty fine, as far as library fees go.
• The Stranger by Albert Camus - I had started it in 2011 and lost the book, but I tracked down another copy and finished the slim novel about being detached from any reasonable emotional responses.

Upcoming:

• Two Gentlemen of Verona by William Shakespeare - I'm going to see it at a free performance in two days, and while I don't have time to read it before then, I will tackle it in August.

In case you’re wondering where I’ve been

For the last two months, I've mostly been studying, along with working and going to weddings/bachelorettes. But, in the last 7 days I have:

• Poured Trillium’s beer at a festival
• Went to a fun NH wedding with a Muppets theme
• Hosted a rugby friend who stayed for 3 days
• Signed a lease; we're moving Aug 4
• Got in a bike accident and bent my handlebars, but no injuries beyond bruises, which I’m used to from rugby
• Had a job interview!
• Prepped for a jury trial on my clinic case that was still going from the spring
• Secured a dismissal in the case
• Finally booked a post-bar vacation! We're headed to Seattle in late August to visit our former roommates Peter and Anita, who are doctors out there. Plus my high school 10 year reunion in MD.
• Worked two shifts at City Sports (but no more shifts until after the bar)
• Ran 1.5 miles twice
• Gone to J.P.Licks three times as a study break

With all this, I’ve been studying as much as I can. The biggest issue was actually the heat wave all week and the apartment has been hitting 92 during the day and only cooling to 85 at night. Our five fans aren’t cutting it and the humidity is at least equal to, and possibly worse than, what I’m used to in D.C.

I had my first true 12 hour study day today, and I’ve got a solid week of them coming up. For fun, I’m going to free Shakespeare on the Common - Two Gentlemen of Verona - on Tuesday and spending 24 hours in MD for a wedding next Saturday. The bar exam is Wed July 31 and Thurs Aug 1.

Wish me luck!

Missing posts?

I think I drafted a post about working retail, but I can't find it, and my bar-addled mind isn't working on non-legal problems.

Plus, I owe a post on graduation festivities.

And I've got another book update from the last 6 months or so. Look for all these updates in August.

Graduation Week

Graduation week! Barbri has already begun. My summer is over.

That might seem a bit melodramatic but it's at least partially true. I have a lot of fun things scheduled for the next week. SBA planned a great commencement week:

Monday - scavenger hunt

Tuesday - BBQ on campus

Wednesday - boat cruise

Thursday - wine and cheese event

Friday - graduation!

I had my first Barbri class today and I have both good and bad feelings. The lecturer had a tons of energy and was even better than I expected, based on good lectures for civ pro and the MPRE. We covered a ton of info in four hours, which is where my concerns come in. It was FOUR HOURS of lecture. And I've got class five, sometimes six times a week, for two months.

I do have a few fun things to look forward to:

3 bachelorette parties, 2 weekend-long and 2 on the beach

3 weddings

Sprint triathlon with BrandonB

Vacation to Seattle in August after the bar

No rugby scheduled yet as the wedding things are most of my weekends, but after jumping back into reffing the last few weeks I hope I can stick with it in the fall.

My family lands at Logan any minute, so the next post will be about fun touristy stuff.

DONE!

One in-class exam, one take-home, and one final paper.

After finishing, I sat in the park across the street with my friend and we just left our dogs run for an hour or two. My neighbor just finished 2L, and I am done. It's still sinking in.

The hardest part is not knowing where I'll go next. I'm in a weird place - done law school, but still two months of bar studying. Excited to be done, but worried about getting a job. Tired of our apt in a noisy, smoky, college-student filled building, but sad to leave the park and worried about moving on September 1.

And, I'm not /quite/ done. My criminal advocacy clinic is set to go to trial on Tuesday. I had the option to hand the case over, but I am excited to stick with it and potentially argue a motion to dismiss, motion in limine, or even go to trial.

Surviving the April showers

This last month sucked.

[4226] (photo updates coming soon)

• Terroristically: As everyone with a tv set knows, two men set off bombs at the Boston Marathon finish line on April 15, and they were killed/apprehended by police by April 18/19. The city was on edge for a week, and the Marathon will probably never be the same. I was cheering at mile 19.7 with Girls on the Run Boston in neon pink shirts, and everyone I know is fine.

• Academically: I'm really disappointed in one of my courses and I feel like the instructor doesn't care. In the previous 2.5 years, I've only had one disappointing class, and I'd hate to finish on a low note. Also, my clinic experience is not going the way I had hoped (that's about all I can say, sorry to be vague)

• Professionally: I'm still unemployed. A few acquaintances got jobs in the last few weeks and I guess I'm happy for them, but that doesn't stop my stomach from doing stress jumping-jacks. (Yes, I would be over the moon if my friends got jobs).

• Socially: I've had a tough adjustment coming back from 3 months in India. I kept in touch with a few people, but I just feel lost, which is exasperated by the quarter system.

• Fitness: I've been working really hard at the gym and eating better, but I haven't lost weight or seen a difference in how my clothes fit. Meanwhile Justin lost 20 pounds!

But then I take the time to slow down a little and remember all the good things that have happened. Maybe life isn't best measured in bullet points, like a resume. Despite my begrudging attempts to avoid celebrating my 28th birthday (Ahhhhh the horrors!), Justin got a few people together and we had a good time cheering on the Bruins and Celtics. A few days later, I went to my first Bruins game!

[4198]

I've gotten back into reffing rugby, center reffing a women's match and a high school boys', plus assistant refereeing (sideline) for two men's D1 playoff matches. All my time in spinning class the last two months has paid off, and I'm in decent shape. Justin got me a super-fancy Vitamix blender for my birthday and I'm drinking green smoothies every other day and feeling good.

I'm feeling connected back at NUSL and am catching up with friends, even though we're about to go our separate ways in a few weeks. I've attended a number of great events this month: PHRGE panels, a Holocaust Memorial Ceremony, ADR info panel, QC discussion on DOMA, two networking events at Suffolk Law, I hosted a potluck for Queer Caucus, and more.

In the next three months I'm looking forward to graduation, moving to a new apartment, bachelorette parties for my sister and two good friends, three weddings, and lots of studying for the bar exam July 31 and August 1.

In the meantime I'll have some less-serious posts on Europe, hotels, and shoes :)

Back on solid ground?

I've been back in the U.S. for six weeks, and back in Boston for just over five weeks. I jumped immediately back into classes:

• First Amendment Law with Prof. Meltsner
• Advanced Crim with Judge Borenstein
• Criminal Advocacy Clinic, serving indigent defendants in Roxbury Court, similar to the work I did on co-op last summer

The best welcome home sign ever, created by BrandonB

But I'm struggling to get caught up on everything else. There's still one paper hanging over my head, my intermittent efforts to exercise and eat healthier, balancing work-study jobs, searching for an apartment for next year, all while catching up with friends I haven't seen in months and remembering how to drive in Boston.

Oh, and did I mention I graduate in 45 days, and I need a job? That's the biggest stress, the one that keeps me up at 3 in the morning. So for my faithful readers that followed my journey across India, I am sorry for the long delay in publishing the last three posts. It may be another month before I upload our adventures in Belgium, Netherlands, Germany, and Luxembourg. I took 1,347 pictures in India and 713 in Europe, so it takes a while. In the meantime, if anyone knows of a public interest legal job, preferably working with children and/or in the criminal justice system, please let me know!

Goodbye India

Things I am missing:

There are a few obvious things that I knew I would miss when I moved to India.

• Playing with dogs
• Peanut butter
• Good beer
• Everyone speaking the same language
• Being away from my family for Christmas

I prepared for this as best I could. I told myself I couldn't pet street dogs, and decided to count them every morning instead. I brought two jars of Peter Pan reduced fat crunchy peanut butter, and my mom brought two more jars when she came to visit :) I accepted that I might not drink for 2.5 months, which isn't a bad thing. I was ready to feel lost and left out by the language barrier, and I was pleasantly surprised to see how many people in Delhi spoke English. My family held a great party before I left, and I saw almost all my relatives.

There are other things that I didn’t consider before I got here, and along the way I found myself missing:

• Political conversations: after GW, I'm used to talking politics on a regular basis, and I missed talking with Justin, BrandonB, my mom, and other people about the stories I read in WaPo daily.
• Seeing a familiar face: I didn't know how much I missed this until one of my professors stopped by Delhi right before Christmas. I was surprised to realize that I hadn't seen a single person I knew in almost a month. That's never happened before - going to college, I had met my roommate at a summer open house; moving to Boston I had great friends from high school and undergrad. A month later, I saw my mom and her friend when they came to India with a tour group.
• A chance to say goodbye to Minnie, our wonderful miniature dachshund, who had to be put to sleep in late January after 17+ years of chasing bunnies, cuddling, and barking incessantly.

I've had a great time, but I am so ready to go home.

Street Dogs

These are some of my dogs that I counted every day walking to work:

A few blocks from the house where I stayed, I would see the first pack of dogs. Patch was a regular, but he wasn't there on this day.

Carefully crossing the busy street

This guy slept in the cart on a regular basis. The owner would leave some rags in the corner and he would curl up and sleep.

No dogs, but view from the RR overpass that I had to walk on the few occasions that a train was on the tracks. The dogs usually scampered across the tracks just like everyone else.

This one slept near a park on the Jangpura side of the tracks.

The one with the white patch is Stoner, my favorite pup. I passed him almost every single day, a few blocks from work. He squinted in the sunlight and never seemed to be fully aware of the noise around him, hence the name. Stoner usually had 1-3 buddies sleeping near him.

Typical Indian street dog - yellow with short fur and long ears that didn't quite stand up.

Showing some wear and tear from a rough life on the street.

Indian dogs spend all their lives in the dust.

Wandering through Central Market for some shopping.

Mama dog in a park near my house. She looks part boxer.

Her lively pup, who only stood still to drink water. The boys in the park chased her relentlessly.

It's hard to be a sleepy puppy.

Valentine's Day + last week at work = breaking my rule and cuddling with street puppies!

All over India in 9 days

I've done more in the last week and a half than I usually do in months. Last Monday I waited impatiently for the travel agency to confirm my waitlist train ticket to Asansol. The next day I was off on a train all by myself, traveling 14 hours overnight to the state of West Bengal. Asansol is the second-biggest city in WB, with 1.2 million people, and is fast-growing.

After 12 straight hours of fact-finding, enjoying chhena sweets with the ANM and the health activist.

In Asansol, I met up with an experienced health advocate (after a scary 6 hours in the city when her train was delayed!) I managed to get a hotel room by myself and spent the extra time knitting and reading. We were there because two months ago, two women died during a sterilization camp. Here's the information  we had when we headed to the hospital:

DURGAPUR, 14 DEC: Two tribal women died today post ligation surgery  at a rural block hospital in Asansol today. Chandmoni Hembram of Kalipathar village and Radharani Tudu of Gaurangadihi village, who underwent ligation at Kelejora Block Primary Health Centre along with 12 other tribal women, died while they were taken to Asansol District Hospital in the late afternoon.

The Asansol administration apprehended that the casualties might provoke the tribals residing in the villages surrounding the rural hospital to unleash attack on the block medical officer and his family. The ADM, Asansol, Mr Jayanta Aikat said: “We have asked police to beef up security surveillance across the hospital area to prevent any untoward situation.”

Tribal housewives queued up at the Kelejora Block Primary Health Centre in Baraboni, about 15 km from Asansol town today where a mass ligation camp was organised. In all 14 women from the adjoining villages underwent tubal ligation surgery at the Kelejora Hospital today.

Chandmoni Hembram and Radharani Tudu, both aged around 40 were also taken to the camp and according to the hospital authorities:
“Their cases became complicated as both complained of gradual deterioration within an hour of operation.” The ADM, Asansol, Mr Jayanta Aikat said: “The medical officers told me that both the women were physically weak, so the rural hospital referred them immediately to the Asansol District Hospital.” On their way to the hospital, both the women died triggering panic among the medical staff. The bodies were kept under supervision at the Asansol Hospital for the night. MLA, Baraboni, Mr Bidhan Upadhyaya said: “Baraboni is a block having 43 villages under eight panchayats and the tribal and downtrodden mass contribute a significant percentage of the demography. The casualties, besides making ligation a fear factor among the backward communities, would also create tension in the area.”
Tubal ligation is a surgery performed to block woman’s fallopian tubes for permanent birth
control.

The district administration has engaged the BDO, Baraboni to table a report on the matter at the earliest.

Taken from: https://kractivist.wordpress.com/2012/12/17/india-2-tribal-women-die-post-ligation-surgery-westbengal-vaw/

Can you imagine this happening in the U.S.? In Boston, or in DC, with all the fantastic hospitals? Women dying at a sterilization camp, and the first reaction is to get the police ready in case the tribal people protest?! Obviously, HRLN wanted to investigate what went wrong and publicize it so this tragedy doesn't occur again. (It's also a little crazy to think they sent me off on a fact-finding based on nothing more than the above report).

I volunteered to go because I wanted to see more of India and I felt comfortable interviewing doctors and hospital administrators after my first fact-finding to Uttarakhand. With the expert translation skills of the health activist and an auxiliary nurse midwife (ANM), sometimes across 3 languages, we were able to talk to administrators, the doctor who performed the sterilizations, and the Santal tribal families of the women who had died (pictured above).

My wonderful guide Preenita, a first year attorney in the HRLN Kolkata office.

 After 2.5 days in Asansol, I hopped on a coach bus (similar to Bolt or Megabus) to Kolkata, only 3.5 hours away. After discussing the trip to Asansol with my supervisor, we both agreed that I might as well go to Kolkata, the capitol of WB and the third largest city in India. It was an opportunity for me to see a beautiful city and also to do some additional fact-finding. I met with a recent law grad and a law student who acted as my translators and we interviewed pregnant women and women with infants. For three long days, we traveled to slums, railroad stations, highway underpasses, and sidewalks lining the streets of Kolkata. As expected, there weren't nearly enough shelters for women and families, but Kolkata did have 35 shelters, far more than the 0 shelters the city government had listed in last year's report.

After 3 days in Kolkata, I got on another long train - 20 hours to Agra, home to the Taj Mahal. Thanks to the Big Bang Theory DVDs Justin had mailed me, it wasn't too bad and I had a small upper bunk to myself with a privacy curtain. I was able to coordinate my trip to catch the tail end of my mom's stay in Agra, and I was able to enjoy dinner, a good night's sleep, and my first bath in months in her hotel.

I went to the Taj and Agra Fort, and then had an uncomfortable ride home on a government-run bus after my coach bus was cancelled.

Overall, an amazing but exhausting trip, and now I have less than a week left!

Exploring Delhi II & my mom's arrival

I've had another weekend of taking in the Delhi sights and sounds during the 26 January Republic Day celebrations. Last month I purchased a pack of postcards and while I recognized and had gone to some of the places (Red Fort, India Gate, Humayun's Tomb), I found that I didn't know many of the places. So, Birla Temple, the Delhi Jantar Mantar, and the Lotus Temple made their way onto my must-see list. I got rather lost in the beginning, and walked at least 10k each day.

Birla Temple, aka Laxminarayan Temple, was built in the 1930s and is far more modern than most of the temples I have been visiting. I couldn't take pictures inside, but I was happy to lose myself for over an hour wandering through its rooms and appreciating the philosophical scriptures. I took a few minutes to slow down from my typical go-go-go approach to sightseeing and collect my chakra, a breathing technique I had learned from yoga. My favorite painting and quotation was from the epic story of Mahabharata:

"He who desires to cross the painful ocean of worldly life, which is full of the crocodiles of lust, anger, greed and infatuation, should catch hold of the Bhagavad Gita which has the disciplines of action, devotion and wisdom as its oars. It will easily take him to the land of liberation (Nirvana)."

I think this postcard went to Elle and Zach because it reminded me of an upside-down heart. The Jantar Mantar in Delhi is similar to the observatory in Jaipur and they are two of the five built in the 1700s with a remarkable ability to track month and time to the second. Even though the buildings were the same, I took some time to relax and read in the palm tree-filled gardens as I was waiting to meet up with a protest marching towards Jantar Mantar.

 

I headed to a counter-protest that one of my HRLN colleagues had told me about. The main points of the protest, as translated to me, were that the massive military parade that I had watched on tv that morning was a overwhelming display of masculine strength and that India needed to take the recent gang rape as a wake up call and change how society treats women.

I headed to the other end of south Delhi to take in the Lotus Temple. To get there, I crossed a huge park filled with people picnicking and and playing cricket. It was a little run down, but was absolutely the sort of place I could see myself hanging out if I lived here.

Look who made it to India! My mom is here for an amazing 17 day tour that will take her to Delhi, Jaipur, Agra, Varanasi, a tiger reserve, and more. After a long flight, we had dinner at her hotel. We shared some spicy dishes and experienced live entertainment.

Her tour guide was amazing and let me tag along the next day to the Qutub Minar. My mom's group is the left of the metal pole, and she is to the left of the woman in the white hat, wearing black.

Next we went to Gandhi Smriti, where Gandhi stayed when he lived in Delhi, with footsteps marking the path he walked on 30 January 1948 when he was assassinated. After that the tour was going places I had already been, so I hopped off the bus to go wander on my own.

I ended up going back to Khan Market for milkshakes and clean bathrooms both days for lunch, and I spent my Sunday afternoon in Lodi Garden reading. I neglected to photograph the largest temples in Lodi Garden last time, and on this repeat visit I discovered a rose garden as well. What a perfect way to cap off the weekend!

Elephant Ride in the Pink City

I went to Jaipur on a whirlwind weekend trip in mid-January with another HRLN intern who arrived a week earlier from Canada. We did as much as humanly possible in 54 hours, including two 5 hour bus rides, a fort, an observatory, a number of beautiful palaces and buildings, and a block printing museum. We also squeezed in a couple of good meals, sitting in a park and watching kites fly, and (unfortunately) a migraine that knocked me out for a couple hours. Here's another pictures-and-captions post and a map of where we went in Jaipur.

Hawa Mahal - the Palace of the Winds where the ladies could look out of the many windows and look down on the Pink City. I'm wearing my favorite kurta which has a block print pattern.

Beautiful stained glass windows

More pretty things at Hawa Mahal

 

Jantar Mantar observatory in Jaipur

This is our elephant.

Riding an elephant up to Amer Fort aka Amber Fort

Amazing detail on the ceilings

Inside Amer Fort is Amber Palace

And inside that is the Hall of Mirrors. So pretty!

  

This step well reminds me of an M.C. Escher drawing

We went to the Anokhi block printing museum and watched this artisan tap out a design in a metal block print. We weren't supposed to take pictures, but we talked to him for a few minutes and asked nicely and he said we could. If you look at the four blocks in the bottom right corner, you can see how they are all part of the same design and each block would carry a different color to the fabric.

Jal Mahal water palace

We had some free time after two days of running from one sight to another, so we took a break in a park in the center of Jaipur. I enjoyed some time with the kindle and watching kids and young men conduct kite battles.