In Limbo

In May, I mentioned to a rugby friend while we were reffing at a tournament that I would love to have a part-time job over the summer. My savings were pretty much exhausted and I also thought it would help structure my bar-studying if I had something else on my schedule.

From the first day at City Sports, I expected to be there 3 months, max. I was making a little over minimum wage, working with kids a decade younger than me, and let's be honest, folding t-shirts. It was a great mindless job while I was studying for the bar.

August has become September...October...November...December. Some of my classmates have found jobs - less than half. NUSL previously offered a Bridge Fellowship where they fund you to work a non-profit half-time for three months. Without explanation, the Bridge Fellowship is not being offered this year.

I deal with all sorts of issues that the low-income clients I usually serve have to deal with:

• my feet hurt after eight hour shifts standing and walking
• not sure about my schedule, not sure I can take days off
• not sure about getting forty hours each week
• trying to get health insurance
• no paid sick days
• can't return phone calls while at work
• exhausted when I get home
• making $9-9.50/hour
• no paid vacation/holidays

Part of me is hoping this will make me a better lawyer someday. Most of me is just exhausted. I'm also embarrassed to not have a job, sad that I am being rejected from positions where I think I would be an asset, and stressed about the minimal number of jobs I can find. I was awash in all of these emotions before going into my big family Thanksgiving (approx 65 people). One relative even had the audacity to ask "Don't you have any prospects?"

I am in limbo, and it hurts.